I hate the feeling of being regret.

I am not talking about the feeling of being regret when I didn`t buy that top that I have been lusting for, didn`t scold that boy and didn`t clean bedroom because it is hard for me to find clothes. -_- I am talking about the feeling of being regret when I pray to Jesus so that I can change the past even though I know it can`t be changed, but at least I am trying. If I had an ability to do that, imagine how many things will happen to me. Happy things.

If only miracles exist. <3


Family and I went for Aunt Ling`s dad`s birthday party. The best thing about the birthday party is alcohol. =) Granddad`s girlfriend was asking me to drink. So mom can`t do anything about it. =) When I went back home, I was sober, but drunk. Sober as in IknowwhatIamdoing and drunk as in alcoholiskillingmybrain, but it was all good. =)

I love children so much. =) Who doesn`t? As a matter of fact, Gaius and I are planning to have threehundredthirtythree children. =)




Before I continue updating my blog, I would love to wish Bernard and Andrew " Happy Siblings` Day ". =)

Yesterday, Sarah and I went to Mid Valley because of Gaius and Jason. After meeting them up, we went seperate ways, Gaius and I were walking around the mall. We watched " Fantastic Four ". After that, we met Sarah and Jason up in Brewball. After that, Gaius`s friends came. After that, we went to Sarah`s place. After that, we went to Wajib. We wanted to buy alcohol, but we didn`t because Sarah`s parents were there, but it was all good. =) After that, we went back to Sarah`s place. I was acting as Ju On to scare Sarah. And it worked. =) Haha. After that, we were talking until we fell asleep.

Today, Sarah, Sarah`s family and I went to F. G. A.. F. G. A. were telling us about Siblings` Day. So go to your siblings` bedrooms, kiss them and hug them. =) After that, we went to Bangsar because of Sarah`s grandmom. Though, Sarah and I went to Bangsar Village. We were acting like rich women. =) Haha. After that, we went back to Sarah`s place. I was waiting for mom to pick me up, but she was taking hours to do that. So I fell asleep, but it was all good. =)




I wish I am one of those people who believe in something. It is not that I don`t want to believe, but people change. When people change, you will be drowning in dissapointment. No one wants to be drowning in dissapointment. So I rather not believe in anything than believe in something.


I thought that Aunt Glory hates me because I am in a relationship with Gaius, but she doesn`t. =) Yesterday, I was on the phone with Gaius. He was telling me about what Aunt Glory said when he bought books for SPM.

Aunt Glory.: Please don`t use a pen to write on the books.
Gaius.: Why I cannot use a pen?
Aunt Glory.: Because the books are going to Carmen for SPM next year.
Gaius.: Oh.

In most of the cases, mom in law and daughter in law are not close, but in my case, I am glad that she cares for me. =) It is the thoughts that count. =)

Today, after school, as I was walking to the shelter I always stand, there was a boy who was starring at me. Not more than one second, he was waving at me with a huge smile. =) He made me realised that there are more than life. =) I am suprised a stranger gave me a reason to breath. =)

Promise me you will be my source of happiness for the rest of my life. <3


I would love to wish dad a " Happy Father`s Day ".




Yesterday, I was talking on the phone with Gaius. He was telling me what his parents told his cousins.

Uncle Thangarajan.: Carmen is a Chinese Korean.
Gaius`s cousins.: So that means she has a pair of small eyes.
Aunt Glory.: No, she doesn`t. She has a pair of huge eyes. And her nose is sharper than all of ours.
Gaius`s cousins.: Oh.

I can`t help, but laugh about it. =) Haha.

I remember Sarah told Sathia I am a Chinese Thailand. He believed her. -_- Haha. From Sathia to Paul to Gaius. And Gaius thought that I am a Chinese Thailand. =) Haha.


Tell me what you will do when you want to let everything go so badly, but you can`t.





My handphone was ringing nonstop because of Sarah. -_-

Sarah came to my place, shouted at me " I miss you so much. " and I asked her " Are you a homoseksual? ". -_- Haha. After that, we watched " A Fourty Years Old Virgin ". After that, Bernard, Sarah and I watched " Ju On ". After that, Sarah went back home because family and I are going to granddad`s place to celebrate Uncle Peng`s birthday.

Meet Carmen The One Of The Superheroes from " Heroes ". =)

Even though we looked happy, but the truth is we hate Carlsbery. We love Tiger. =)

I wasn`t horny.

Yesterday, Gaius called me. Call me a backstabber, but I love to gossip to Gaius. That is what a hubby for. A real hubby.[ It is an inside joke. ] =) Haha. Anyway, we were talking until he finished his credit. So we went to sleep. All of a sudden, my handphone was ringing. It was a message from Gaius. =) So we were messaging each other until I slept off. -_- Haha. After that, he called me to wish me a good morning. =)

Gaius dedicated " Call My Name " by Prince.

I just can`t stop writing songs about you,
I love you so much,
I just can`t wait to get my arms around you,
And feel your touch,
If I don`t see you real soon,
Baby girl, I might go insane,
I know it is only been about three hours,
but I love it when you call my name.

" Call My Name " by Prince.

Thank you for being the sun that shines my day. <3